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The transition periods are often the most difficult
Wednesday, 23 May 2007
Someone I know quite well once discovered that his wife of five years was seeing another man behind his back. He found out when she suddenly announced she was leaving him for her new beau. He was out of town at the time, and when he returned he found most of the furniture in his house missing. The new couple had taken what they wanted and disappeared.
My friend was devastated. He'd known they were going through a rough patch in their relationship, but he had no idea she was about to walk out on him. Sitting alone in his empty house, he felt as if he'd lost everything. It must have been a very dark period in his life.
Yet five months later, he had a new girlfriend. He's now happily married to her and considers her the love of his life. Looking back on his first wife, he now believes they weren't as suited to each other as they had initially believed.
The break-up with his first wife was difficult, but necessary to find the happiness he now holds. The transition period between the two relationships was extremely difficult. It wouldn't surprise me if he considered suicide. But it turned out to be for the best.
When I was at school, my family used to move around a lot. I'd arrive in a new town with no friends and no idea how to conduct myself. Slowly, over a couple of years, I'd build a new life for myself. These early days were often difficult. But eventually, I'd have a new group of lifelong acquaintances. Now, when I travel I know people all over the place.
Once again, the transition period between one life and another was difficult. But once it was over, my life was richer than ever.
One of the most challenging things people face is transferring into a new existence. You've just become comfortable with the old one, when suddenly you're thrown into a sea of confusion and loneliness. To feel frightened, hurt and worried under such circumstances is absolutely normal.
We pretty much all go through periods when our life is turned upside down. Sometimes this occurs because of a decision we've made, other times it may just be thrust upon us.
I've been through many such times myself. And I know they aren't easy. But almost without exception, I've come out of these periods with new friends, new skills and new experiences. Despite the hardships they bring, they often also enrich my life.
The transition periods in life are often the most difficult. Learn how to hunker down for them and you'll earn the rewards they have to offer. Even better, make an active effort to use them to improve your existence.
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