Lifehacks







Five simple exercises for improving your willpower

Tuesday, 22 August 2006

Being successful is largely about gaining control over some aspects of the external world. But it's difficult to do that until you've got control over the internal world of yourself. In life, the strength of your self-discipline very often determines the likelihood of your success. Because of that, self-control is a skill worth developing.

And it is just another skill that can be practiced and improved upon - like tennis, playing the piano or programming a computer.

You can see evidence of this simply by watching children. Most of them have terrible self-control. They squirm, lose their tempers, and do the wrong thing no matter how much you threaten or reward them not to. A cookie jar and an adult with a turned-back is all it takes to shatter any child's self-discipline.

Yet even the most organized adult once went through the emotional roller-coaster of childhood. Just like a golf pro who once had never held a club until he started training, disciplined people coach themselves in the methods of power over the self.

Here are some simple exercises you can do if you need to build up your own willpower.

Drop a small bad habit
I went to the dentist for a check-up a couple of years ago and found I'd developed my first ever cavity. The dentist asked me if I'd been eating anything sweet. The only thing I could think of was the teaspoon of sugar I added to my twice-daily cup of tea. Apparently, doing this coats the teeth in sugar and leads to cavities.

No problem, I simply stopped putting sugar in my tea. At first, it didn't taste as nice, but now I actually prefer it that way.

This is an example of dropping a small bad habit. Other examples include giving up a regular afternoon snack, pressing the snooze button on the alarm clock, or having one too many coffees a day. Giving up something small but significant is great self-discipline practice.

Learn something boring but useful
Most people skip learning important skills simply because doing so is boooorrrrrriiiing. Consider skills like grammar, punctuation, financial literacy, technical skills and the like. I'm sure you can think of at least one such skill that you could do with brushing up on.

Go down to the library or bookstore and pick up a book on the topic you choose. Make sure it's something necessary that you have a distaste for. Now read that book all the way through within the next week.

Do something you know you should every day for a week
We all have things we know we should be doing but aren't. Perhaps for you it's regular exercise, household chores, or getting up earlier. Choose one such activity and set a week where you'll do it for a set amount of time every day. Make a rule with yourself that for every day you miss, you'll add two days to the end of that week.

Set yourself an achievable, but difficult goal with a date for reaching it
Build yourself a willpower game around a particular goal. Perhaps it could be giving up smoking, losing a certain amount of weight, or reading a particular number of books. Organized events such as fun-runs are also good.

Make sure it's something that's reachable with a high level of certainty (such as quitting smoking) as long as your will holds. In other words, no external events other than your own self-discipline should be able to have a major impact.

Developed a single-minded focus on achieving that goal by the set date. Don't let yourself pass the day without reaching it.

Have a month where you ban yourself from putting anything off
Every day we get tasks which can be done immediately, but usually aren't. Good examples are paying the bills, emptying the dishwasher, or starting a college assignment. Put aside a month where you'll refuse to allow yourself to put such things off. As soon as the task becomes known, force yourself just to do it. Don't allow yourself to wait for even five minutes before getting started, and get the task finished as soon as is humanly possible.




Self help & motivationHow to be cool
Yes, yes I know. The title of this article is a little immodest. I'm not saying that I'm the world's coolest man or anything like that. In fact, underneath it all I'm a bit of a geek.
Self help & motivationWhat to do when you've made a life-shatteringly bad decision
Let's face it, despite our often high opinions of ourselves, we're all human really. There's not a person on this planet who hasn't made an incredibly stupid decision at some stage that's had life-changing consequences. You'll certainly make such a dumb call yourself some day, as will I and everybody else.
Self help & motivationHow to get control of your body
The evidence that people in rich modern societies have lost control of their bodies is widespread. Poor eating, drug use, and lack of exercise are common habits. Why is it that we have such difficulty gaining power over our bodies, and what can we do about it?
Self help & motivationPerfect contentment leads to stagnation
Have a look at how so many of us live our lives. We get up in the morning, go out all day and work, work, work. Whether in a rich country or a poor one, a good neighbourhood or bad, you can be sure that most of the people around you will be working most of the time.
Self help & motivationGet yourself some allies
People I know who are introverted often tell me they don't really understand why outgoing people expend so much time and effort on socialising. They see it all as being a bit shallow and a waste of effort. But I think they miss the point in a lot of ways.
Self help & motivationGet over yourself
We live in a culture that's obsessed with self-esteem. A person can achieve no greater thing than believe in their own special importance, or so we're told.
Self help & motivationDo lots of small, cheap experiments
I once met a guy who'd built a successful website that he'd made a lot of money from. It's always interesting to talk to people who've done well, so I asked him what his secret was.
Self help & motivationLearn how to deal with the unknown
Deep down inside, it's human nature to have a fear of that which we haven't had direct experience with. The default setting for many of us seems to be suspicion of people, food, countries, organizations and any number of other things we don't know much about.
Self help & motivationGive away lots of little gifts
It amazes me how many people don't pay attention to developing their relationships. Other people are extremely useful in life. Indeed, for me, I think they are probably my favourite thing in the whole world. A good connection with another can be the most wonderful thing you can have.
Self help & motivationIt's extremely difficult to change people
Most of us have someone in our life we'd like to change. It might be a lover, a child, a boss, or a neighbor. We try every trick at our disposal to meet that end, but in general we are likely to fail.

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