|
Many people will do the minimum they can to get by
Friday, 2 November 2007
Have you ever noticed how many people operate at way below their potential? The genius who works an average office job, the fantastic woman who dates losers, the talented artist who spends all day in front of the TV. Why do such people not put in more effort?
I think there's something about us humans that's inherently lazy. We're willing to put in just enough effort to get by, but not much more. At least, that's the case with many people.
You can see this particularly in relationships. We all know somebody who's in a toxic relationship and think to ourselves: "Why do they put up with it?"
It's probably the "doing minimum to get by" problem. That person may not be happy in their relationship, but finding something better is just too much work. Even putting in the effort to improve their current relationship takes effort and a step outside the "comfort zone".
So they just coast on in a barely acceptable situation instead.
The flip side of this coin is that when you challenge people, you can often be surprised at the results.
We've all been thrown into situations where we felt way out of our depth before. Whether it's learning to drive, starting a new job, or hanging out with a new group of people. Suddenly we think to ourselves "I'm not up to this". And boy does it sting.
But if pushed, we can rise to the challenge. Seemingly insurmountable obstacles will be overcome. Yes it hurts, but we come out the other end a better person.
Sports coaches often see this at work. When I was younger, I used to do swimming training. I can remember the first few days of the training, the coach would insist I complete the program he set for me. That meant, among other things, a 500 meter swim just for warm-up. I'd never swum such a distance before and it was extremely hard.
In fact, there were times when I thought I might drown. But the coach pushed me to keep going long after I would have given up if it was up to me. The social pressure made me complete the warm-up.
Within weeks, I was swimming such distances regularly. I'd be doing kilometres of hard training without a second thought. I'd been forced to push far past my boundaries. And when the chips were down, I found I could do so.
Look at areas in your life where you're doing the minimum to get by. Have the courage to admit this to yourself.
Then put yourself in a situation where you'll be pushed to go way past the boundaries you've set. Circumstances involving social pressure are particularly good for this - jobs, courses, coaching and so on. Yes, it will hurt in the beginning. You'll feel weak, hopeless and out of your depth. But you'll come out of it a stronger person - guaranteed.
 | How to hook up with members of the opposite sex | | A man and a woman meet each other at a singles bar. He bowls her over with his conversation, she dazzles him with her beauty. Within moments, they fall in love. Three months later they're married. |  | Much of success is about knowing how to anticipate problems | | When I was in my teens, my friends and I were addicted to arcade games. This is a pretty typical obsession with boys. I spent lots of my pocket-money on such games and even managed to win some of them. |  | How to develop more sophisticated taste | | We live in an impatient world. Technology has given up unprecedented control over what we consume. If you don’t like what you’re watching on TV, there’s a hundred other channels just waiting for you to flick over to them. |  | Concentrate on the future | | We all have miserable events happen to us in life. Believe me, I’ve had my share too. | | Learn the skill of resilience | | I saw a very interesting TV documentary a couple of weeks back on the issue of happiness. It was asking what makes us happy and what makes happy people different from those who aren't. | | Six things likely to make you happier in the long-term | | I've previously looked at how to get a short-term "hit" of happiness. Now I'll explore the more important subject of long-term happiness. | | Work hard to give yourself lots of options and opportunities | | Always finish what you start, is an adage that many people try to follow. And it's a good one in a lot of ways. But it probably focusses too much on the importance of the entire process towards achieving a goal. Generally, it's the earlier part that's most important, in my view. | | Take some time to reflect on how astonishing it all is | | Sometimes we all feel as if we're living grey little lives. We want to be moving galaxies, but instead we're stuck in traffic, feeling ill, assigned boring tasks, or filling in tax returns. No wonder everyone feels a bit down every now and again. |  | The four measures of financial success | | If you want to do well financially, you must first understand what it is you have to achieve. It's not just a matter of making more money. Instead, there are four factors you must consider. | | Be aware of your competing desires | | Theodore Dalrymple is an interesting writer who often has keen insights into the emotional turbulence within us all. He's a doctor and psychiatrist who spent many years practising in a hospital and a prison in a deprived area of England. As he had to deal so much with those at the bottom of life's heap, he witnessed many of the tragedies that face us all at their most raw. |
New articles are being added all the time, so make sure you bookmark Paul's Tips and come back.
|
|