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If you're not falling over sometimes, you're not trying hard enough
Tuesday, 1 May 2007
When I was a kid, my family used to go skiing a lot. We lived only a few hours drive from the ski-fields, and my parents belonged to a club that had a lodge there. My brother and I used to love going out onto the slopes and racing each other to the bottom.
I can remember one particular time when I was really proud of myself because I'd been skiing the whole day and not fallen over once. I must have thought this was a great thing at the time, because I remember bragging about it back at the lodge.
That's when an experienced older skier gave me a bit of advice that has served me well throughout life: "If you're not falling over sometimes, you're not trying hard enough".
We all want an easy life. A chance to cruise along gently without putting in too much effort. Everyone dreams sometimes of getting what they want without trying hard.
But is this really the path to happiness? I think not. We humans seem to have a built in need to solve problems. If we're not challenged, we sink into stagnation and depression.
The problem is that, like falling over while skiing, challenges can hurt. They can also be somewhat scary. In fact, if you're not feeling a little pain and fear during the process, then it's just not hard enough. You're not growing unless there's a reasonably high possibility of failure.
And of course, this is what's so hard about challenging yourself. It requires you to enter territory that you're unfamiliar with. Where the old tricks and skills you've used just aren't as handy as they were.
Almost everything we do has these attributes during the early stages. Riding a bike, swimming, going to school, learning an intellectual skill, making friends, and starting work. During the early days, it's inevitable that at times it will all seem too big and scary for you. Yet, you overcame these difficulties, and you'll overcome others in the future.
The problem with moving into adulthood is that we're often offered an easy path away from personal growth. We can cruise along on what we've already achieved and simply relax. This is a mistake.
Instead of just milking what you already have, challenge yourself somehow. Put yourself in a position where you can fall over. It may be a new career move, a sport, learning something, or entering a different social situation. Whatever it is, make sure it hurts and gets you a little scared.
After all, if you're not falling over sometimes, you're not trying hard enough.
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